It’s my birthday today! Love me. Adore me. Oh wait, you already do.
Just kidding. But since it is my birthday, I’m going to celebrate me because I can and you can’t stop me.
1. My birthday is exactly two weeks away from Christmas. I always know what day Christmas is on, because it’s the same day my birthday is but two weeks later. Boom. Science.
2. This year I will celebrate my birthday roughly three different times. I’m not limited to a single day. No mere 24 hours can handle this. And to be honest, each year I celebrate my birthday an average of three or four times. Why? Why not.
3. This is more of a general birthday thing, but when my dad sings happy birthday, he’ll harmonize right at the end. The 98% of the song he’s leading the troops. The last 2% he has fun with it. I look forward to it. Every. Year.
4. Last year my mom bought my the Harry Potter series with the new covers. I put it on my list, but I 100% did not think that I’d actually get it. When I opened the box, I legit cried. It’s probably the best reaction I’ve ever given for a gift before. I was twenty-five, for reference.
5. I’m terrible at showing emotion when opening gifts. I don’t know how to control my face, but I swear there’s a 95% that I really do love the gift, I’m just god-awful at emotions on demand.
6. CAKE. Need I say more?
7. In eighth grade, my mom made me cupcakes with tie dye frosting to give to my class. They looked so awesome and they tasted like fulfilled dreams. It was so cool.
8. Same year, same cupcakes: mom brought them during library time, so half the class was in the library. She put a cupcake on everyone’s desk. I ate mine gleefully, but I also watched Erik Lawrence devour his, which isn’t the greatest part. I watched him look over at the cupcake on Amanda A’s desk, and I remember thinking, “Don’t do it.” Then, in a moment of sheer brilliance, he reached over and stuck his finger directly into the middle of the frosting and then licked the frosting off his finger. I had to reshape the frosting, but I still laugh about it to this day. He just shrugged the whole thing off like it couldn’t be helped. That kid.
9. I celebrated my twenty-first birthday at Applebee’s the night before I took my Brit. Lit. final. I was so hungover for that exam. I thought I was going to die. The next semester, I was talking to my prof about how hungover I was. I remember his reaction because it’s the only time he’s ever acted impressed by me. He said, “You did outstanding for being hungover.” Nailed it.
10. Sometimes I get jealous of people with summer birthdays because, essentially, every six months it’s like OOO! Gifts! Then I remember that December is basically me going, “Step aside, bitches. This is my month.”
And I feel much better.